


Divergence

by ChristinaK



Category: Firefly
Genre: Character Death, Death, Gen, Madness, Reavers - Freeform, Violence, mentions of cannibalism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-10
Updated: 2015-08-10
Packaged: 2018-04-13 22:59:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4540701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChristinaK/pseuds/ChristinaK
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two paths diverge in space; and you take the one more traveled by.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Divergence

**Author's Note:**

> Written before the Big Damn Movie came out. So all divergences can be considered alternate universe.
> 
> READ THE TAGS. The violence is not graphic, but can be disturbing. It's Reavers, so. Keep that in mind.

It starts with the proximity alert shrieking through the ship, and it ends with a puff of air leaving your lips. 

"--proximity alert, imminent collision, repeat, this is the--"

_*flash*_

"I can't turn it, we're caught in a magnetic tractor, the damn thing must be ten klicks wide!" Wash's eyes are huge, and he's gritting his teeth, the muscles in his arms straining as if he could yank Serenity off its path by the strength of his grip on the controls. You watch from a corner, hardly breathing, feeling his frustration as your own.

"There's got to be a way to break it--"

"Not from here, Mal. That web's waiting for us, once we're in it, we're toast! Damnit. I should've turned back at the approach to the system, gone around--"

"You couldn't know." Mal's jaw is set, his eyes reflecting the stars outside, giving back nothing as he spins the possibilities, the chances and hopes from every angle, looking for an out. "That's my job."

And the word screaming in his mind, so loud it screams in yours too, as he checks over the tactics and strategy, location and distance-- far, so very far from the nearest Alliance route, is: Reavers. 

Has to be. Can't be. Is. 

Reavers.

_*flash*_

"Jayne! Inara! Prep the shuttles for launch. Let's see if we can't bust free if we give the web more surface area to work with. Maybe we can overload it, spread out the charge. Zoe, load weapons in case this goes south." Mal is pounding down the corridor, firing orders machine-gun fast, still thinking of all the may-be's and could-be's, brain faster than his mouth and five steps ahead of everyone else. "Wash, be ready to wrench free on my signal--"

"Yes, Captain."

"Got it, Mal."

"Mal?"

"Don't argue with me, Inara. I'll reimburse you once we're out of this. And we will get out of this."

"I was going to ask, do you know who they--"

"No. I don't know."

_*flash*_

The ship's shuttles take out the attacking transports as they come for Serenity, hanging trapped in the magnetic field. Using its inertia and spin to push off, letting the centrifugal force send the smaller pods toward the aggressors, the speed overcoming the magnetic pull for the seconds necessary to defend Serenity. Fragments fly silently through the void, shrapnel soundlessly smashes those behind them, buying the ship time. Precious time.

Fifteen minutes.

"Mal. There's-- there's ten more of them, behind those five we just took out. Getting closer. They're still coming. What's our next plan?"

"I'm working on it, Wash. Just wait. Keep waiting for an opening to steer us clear. Kaylee, shut down to conserve power 'til I give the signal."

"Okay, Cap'n. But we're gonna need at least ten minutes from cold-start--"

"Better that than no engines at all 'cause we overloaded them."

"Weapons prepped and ready, sir."

"Good. That's real good. And there's something else I want you to do, Zoe."

_*flash*_

"Glad you got Vera that new space-suit."

"Told you she'd be worth it. Ain't you, baby?" Jayne readies his gun, aims her steadily at the nodes of the docking web, relaxed as if he's in bed with a woman giggling in his ear. 

Pfftt.

Pffftttt.

"That's two gone, we're loose, yes! Great shooting--"

"Aww, thanks, it weren't--"

"Kaylee, get those engines heated now!"

A curtain of electricity is falling away as the power to the magnetic tractor grid fades.

For seven minutes.

"Mal... I'm sorry. I couldn't get her going-- there just wasn't enough time. I tried, I really did...."

"This isn't your fault, Kaylee. It'll never be your fault. Got that?... Good. Now help Wash with those barricades. We got an hour or so before they're inside, let's make the most of it."

"Sir, is it--"

"Let's not go borrowing trouble, okay?"

But Kaylee knows, she knows in her fingers the way they know the thrum of the engines. She knows because Mal is scared, even if it's just showing in the tightness around his eyes and the fast way he talks. And because anyone else, other than Reavers, they wouldn't build up barricades for. Mal has a plan, she can tell, so if they just go along with it, he'll get them out of this. It won't end like it did for those people on the cargo ship. This isn't the end.

_*flash*_

"Get your sister in the crawlspace, then you get in there and keep her quiet."

"No. I'll put her in there, but I'm staying. Just like the rest of the crew."

"Doc, you're no use to us in a fight--"

"Someone's going to get hurt, you know it, and you'll need me to patch them up."

"Doc-- Simon. If someone gets hurt in this fight, you're not gonna be able to do them any good. Trust me on this."

"Why should I start now? River, it's time for you to hide."

You know. You're not scared. You know this is how it has to be.

"Doc...."

"Captain, I'm doing what I must to protect my sister and the rest of your crew. Let me do my job."

"Gorramit--"

"Mal?" He turns to you, and you smile at him, relaxed and happy. "I like your plan. I wanted to see the stars again."

"Well... thanks. Good to know the crazy girl approves," he mutters under his breath. 

"Simon should stay. He holds grudges, you know," you tell him, and then you smile at Simon. You lean over and hug him, smelling antiseptic/cotton/the cologne Kaylee gave him at the last planet, as Mal scowls, his eyes sad. And you sigh with relief, knowing what happens next.

"Mei-mei... I'll see you soon. Don't worry."

"I won't."

_*flash*_

Wash's cry is sharp and loud, even over the gunfire. He crumples at Zoe's feet, taking the bullet of the Reaver who was aiming for her pretty neck. Silly. Sweet, though.

"Wash? Wash!" Zoe's firing accelerates, faster and faster, frantic for her husband, who doesn't answer. The Reavers are coming in from four sides now-- left, right, front and from below-- and their shrieking is as loud as the guns.

"WASH! Honey, no, please...." Zoe is pulling Wash back, behind the barricades, and three bullets hit her, arm, thigh, chest, thud, thud, ow. She chokes, almost letting go of Wash, but then she falls backward, pulling him with her as she collapses.

"Get them out of here, Doc! We'll cover you!" Jayne stands and grins maniacally, spraying the ceiling-- now crawling with Reavers-- with covering fire. Book says nothing, but aims and shoots five Reavers in the space of a prayer, as your brother helps a limping Zoe and unconscious Wash back down the corridor toward sickbay.

Mal doesn't look, can't look, just keeps the image of Wash and Zoe laughing at that shindig in front of his eyes.

_*flash*_

A soft gasp is all Mal hears, off to his left. He glances over without taking his fingers off the triggers of his guns, and sees Inara go down in a splash of bright green silk. The dark stain around the knife in her gut is going to make her hell-mad when she wakes up, he thinks. Then he realizes how stupid he is, how beautiful she is, how he wanted something... else.

Her eyes are begging him, her mouth is moving, but there's already a little smear of blood between her lips. He almost says her name, but she can't hear him over the fighting, and it's just too late--

Bang, bang, bang, five dead, ten dead, you bastards, die, damn you all to rutting bloody gorrammed hell--

"Receive into your presence, O Lord, the soul of Inara, friend, companion, and bright spirit--"

He thinks that he'll have to ask Book how he does that, pray and shoot at the same time, after this. After it's over.

_*flash*_

"KAYLEE!"

The Reaver grabbed her from below, tamade, they're getting past the perimeter, and Jayne shoots the one with his arm around Kaylee's neck, then the one with his hands on her legs, then the one pulling her back, but she's still moving down, screaming, moving away from the rest of them--

You're not looking at this. You're not you're not you don't have to you don't you aren't you'renotlookingyou'renotlookingyou'renotlooking--

_*flash*_

"He's going to be okay, right Doc? Right?" Zoe's voice is bright and cheerful and desperate, and Simon's answer is as automatic as it is false.

"Yes." He slowly brushes his fingers over the lids of Wash's eyes, and stands so Zoe can't see what he's doing. "Yes, Zoe. He's going to be fine."

_*flash*_

Bang! The last Reaver holding onto Kaylee falls to the deck. 

Jayne looks into her eyes, and looks at the blood all over her, the bitemarks, the knife in her neck, half-way in, half-way... not... and he looks into her eyes, and she closes them, trusting him without him having to ask. 

"Bye, girl. See you."

Bang!

Ten more Reavers fall in half a breath as Jayne turns back to the rest of the fight, angry, angry, angry, and so damn tired. 

_*flash*_

Inara's unconscious and her eyes aren't focusing on anything. Mal takes one last look at her, the green fabric and the dark spill of hair and the gold skin that always looks so soft, and then he shoots. And shoots. And shoots again, buying time. Just a little more time. Book and Jayne are shooting too, over and over. Jayne came back without Kaylee a few minutes ago, and Mal is trying very hard not to think about that.

The Reavers are closer now. Still wary. But they're on all five sides now, the corridor behind the crew the only place where they're not coming in. Bodies piled up knee-deep. Mal flashes, just for a second, back to Serenity Valley, and this feels like home. So damn familiar. 

But the Alliance never got this close.

_*flash*_

"Just relax, Zoe. This won't hurt. Wash will be awake before you will. He'll be waiting for you."

"Hate needles... Hey, Doc?"

"Yes?"

"Thanks for saving me, couple months ago. Didn't want to leave Wash. Love him. You know?"

"I know. Shhhh... That's it. Count back from twenty for me, okay?"

"Twenty... nineteen... eigh'teen... sev'nteen... sixteen... fiveteen...." Zoe's voice trails off into a whisper as her pulse slows and her eyes drift shut. Simon wishes he could say a prayer, but he knows it wouldn't do any good. He holds Zoe's hand until he's sure she's gone, then folds her arms across her chest.

The drug he loads his own needle with isn't the same thing he gave Zoe. It's going to hurt. A lot. Convulsions, labored breathing-- but it's the only way he can take some of the bastards with him. He thinks of Kaylee, hopes that Mal will keep her safe, hopes she isn't hurt, hopes he'll see her again if it all goes wrong.

The pounding on the doors is loud now, insistent. Frightening. He clenches his fist, and injects the cocktail he invented. Winces as it goes in, burning. He considers opening the door for them, getting it over with, but decides to make them work for it.

"Mei-mei... River. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

_I hear you, Simon. I'm okay. I love you. It's going to be over soon...._

The seizures hit as the door opens, and they are on him. Twelve of them die as Simon does, the poison he injected coursing through them, the blood they drunk and flesh they bit stopping their hearts. He is smiling on the inside.

Your brother holds grudges.

_*flash*_

The next time Mal looks, Book is down, bleeding too much to live for longer than a minute, and Jayne's shot but still on his feet, and Mal's covered in blood that doesn't all belong to someone else--

This is the way the world ends-- no, gorrammit, it's not, it's almost time--

_*flash*_

You smile at the Reavers who followed your blood trail into the airlock from your hidey-hole. Just a pin-prick. Just enough to leave them bread crumbs to follow you into your forest. 

They smile back at you, turning their knives, silent as you regard each other, waiting for you to scream. You understand each other. 

But you know something they can't, and your smile is wider for it. 

You can feel the flames before they start, and the vibration from the explosion before it reaches this hold, and the cold of space before the walls rip apart--

When the explosives Mal set finally go off, the airlock blows open, pouring you out into the dark emptiness surrounding Serenity. 

The Reavers scream, terrified, knowing they've been tricked--

And you are flying again, your head tilted back to the stars with your last breath of air.

_*flash*_

"--proximity alert, imminent collision, repeat, this is the--"

And you gasp as you crash into the world again, touch taste sound sight smell hurting you, real again, there again, knowing it's starting. It's starting. It's ending. They are ending.

No, it's starting.

_I can see the forest for the trees. But I can't find the path._ You reach out, touch the catwalk you'd been crouched on above the main bay of the ship, feel the grating beneath your hands: not the icy emptiness of space, or the hard solidity of Serenity's cargo hold. It feels less real than your memories do.

There's smoke, and fog, and deadwood scattered around you. But you know there's a path. In a million probabilities and moments between the now and the then, there has to be one in which you walk out of the forest alive. But the smoke is still choking you, and death has its own fascination, and you can't look away from the stars inside your head, and--

"River? Honey, what's wrong?"

Kaylee is suddenly there, kneeling next to you, not bleeding, not crying, alive. Real. Heartbeat, breath, touch of a hand. Which means Simon is alive, which means Mal and Wash are still alive, which means--

You grab Kaylee's hand, and use it to pull yourself up, staggering. "No time. I can show you. Not enough time to tell you."

"Time for what? River--"

"To get out of the forest before it all burns." 

You run, taking the steps two at a time as you head for the bridge, yelling Wash's name now, the path in front of your eyes, under your feet, opening around you; the smell of non-existent smoke still strong, but replaced by Serenity's scent, Wash's voice, Kaylee's concern. Resisting the urge to go deeper into the thicket of possibilities, just to see what is there.

Some paths are best left to be swallowed by the forest.

**Author's Note:**

> A big thank-you to Roseveare, for reading this on the WIP_Amnesty lj community and telling me she thought it was almost done, instead of completely unfinished, the way I thought it was, as well as generously offering to beta. 
> 
> Thanks also to Tina for agreeing with her and giving me the title (after three not-quite-satisfactory ones), Perri for suggesting the second-person POV and very scrupulous editing, Val and Dee and Lizbet for commentary and encouragement, and the other Horsechicks for going "ooh!" Finally, credit to Robert Frost, for "Stopping in Woods on a Snowy Evening" and "The Road Less Traveled".
> 
> Started in late 2002 before "Objects in Space" aired, thoroughly Joss'd as a result, and probably influenced on rewrite by "...And Not Fade Away" on Angel. But at least I hit the reset button. 
> 
> Written before the Big Damn Movie came out. Apparently I and Joss Whedon had similar ideas about which direction this series could go.


End file.
